Showing posts with label sasha. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sasha. Show all posts

20.4.10

Nothing Personal

So in time I've come to realize that when a male and a female don't establish from the get go the
premise of the relationship beforehand, it can get complicated, and confusing.
If for instance in the case of a female, when she has no relative interest in the male as far as just
being friends, yet it wasn't interpreted by the male that way, then it can come off as the first stages of a romantic relationship. The male can take it out of context and see it for something its not.
But whose to blame?
Nobody, or both sides?
The signs male and females send can be as clear as day for the individual relaying them, but candlelit to the person reciving. I'm talking about the labels we don't give relationships in the beginning.
In my experience it has occured more often than not, that what really isn't there, can be confused for just that, because acts of kindness, genuine interest, and fondness are misinterpreted for more than what they are
I guess unless you have grown up with that person, thats incomprehendable.
I had to take a step back and see for myself that I was at fault for not being tactful in the beginning stages of getting to know someone, and having that person thinking otherwise.
And its a sad feeling when the one who is let down is someone you care about.
But again, whose to blame? Nobody really. You can't say it isn't a sticky situation when that person vebalizes his/her interest for you, and you don't share the same feelings. It hurts, and if you say it doesn't, "you lying :\"
Especially when you have the understanding that "we're just friends"and interpreting actions to be understood as mutual feelings, then the bomb gets dropped.
When trying to establish a bond for years to come, that support system that so many of us are missing, friendships can become jeopardized if both parties aren't on the same page.
No one enjoys rejection, and its even worse when the rejector was unaware of the feelings the rejectee had, on top of that person being someone special.
When every things said and done, do those feelings ever go away, or are they laying in wait ?
The friendship that emerges out of mutual understanding, and growing to care for each other do those feelings take shape once more within the person?
Platonic male and female relationships are never really free from physical desire, because human nature will one day have you thinking about what that person looks like naked, or what it would be like to be with them.
Even if only for a fleeting second, these thoughts aren't wrong, its just natural.
It seems like as I'm getting older ,and becoming a woman, the relationship vernacular between friends and I will have to change, and affection and admiration will either be seen as 'one love' or 'hot sex on a platter'
If there aren't any boundaries, and for lack of a better word, 'labels' to established roles in friendships, can things that go unsaid cause damage that cannot be undone?
Communication is key, and I have to get Bilingual in my case. Both verbal and physical.
Actions speak louder than words, but words get to the point.

23.11.09

New Post

BORED OUT MY GORD...

so I was searching the web... Besides the bullshit going on on TV I have resorted to online tele.
It's less commercials and I can pause it and go piss, thanks technology ;)

I found the Chappelle Show! 
But wait there's more! 
All 3 seasons!
But wait even more, there's more!
no commercials!!!!!

OMFGGGGG
Oh My Fucking Goodnessssssss
I know that was OD. (I love that word, OD ::scene:: "bitch you ugly" "OOOHHHDDEEEEE")
lmao

ii.
I'm going through some shit and I don't know what to do :\
I'm pretty as shit, I don't feel bad about my looks, or any insecure shit like that, but I'm convinced everyone else is. 
Especially boys!
At least the young ones.
They seem to, look, glance, STARE at times, but thats about it.
With older men they STARE approach with something strange like, what time is it, or where can i find the train. you know regular shit.
and end up getting the number. deadass though.
Its strange but true. The older guy who came up like , 'fuck I got nothing to lose' will in the end get the number. 
*as long as they pretty enough, funny, or the pockets looking right.* 
-don't judge, I'm a young girl ;)-

Anyway I just don't understand it. I'm fed up.
I guess Im just an old soul. I'm just old fashioned and the older guys see it, while the younger ones wonder.

In other news, I quit smoking. -for now-
It was abrupt, I was with my Afrikan boi and he copped some bud from some spanish dudes on the bodega block.
I rolled a pretty L. I mean pretty, that shit was sexier than a mutha-mmmmm!

I smoked it, was feeling right.... and then
-BAM!-
paranoia up the ass, like a bitch had gas.
(trying something new)
My heart was thump thump thumping,
sweating, twitching and shit like I had a tick.
Mind you, MIND YOU I HAD JUST SEEN PARANORMAL ACTIVITY A WEEK PRIOR TO MY PARANORMAL ACTIVITY.
I don't know but I was just buggin' out, for two days straight. not as severe as the first but good enough.

So thats why I quit -for now-
Just to take a break.

Lastly the News on studio. I'm getting better. I'm working on cadence I just need to enunciate and put some Busa Buss innah it!
I feel like I'm on my way, and I'm making moves. With the support of my family, friends, and blog fam, I hope to achieve this soon. You may not think it, but I'm as humble as ever.
Word to me and you can quote this. People who have influenced, changed, support, or even just been there for me I will repay you, no matter what.
I just know I will, I'm here for y'all, I'm here for the people I want to represent y'all.
I already told my niggas that if I do get enough buzz, and the contract they giving me is bullshit, I will just distribute through online means
Tour by my own means and sell that Crack to make that money nigga!!! LMAO

ii I'm out. Love peace and soulllll!

22.11.09

sweet dreams

hey my brothas n sisters u kno i missed ya =D

i been super duper busy...school *yea right*
not working and reading everybody else's blog i aint have time peep my own BLOG
i've been in the studio for a good minute...it may look i have nothing to show for it but I do have a track that im super proud of =D


Sweet Dreams Remix - Beyonce Ft. Sasha

i fucks with it..lets see if yall do too =D

26.10.09

Do it to Death

shit 
my 
bad. 

y'all was thinking some next shit happened from my last entry, but nah
I'm tougher than nails and too cool for that. Wasup though, now we have a lot to cover.
for one


1. My iMac's hard drive said "F**K YOU B***HES" :\ not working and it hurts my heart. 

2. I lost my iPod Touch recently, lets say Sunday and got a call Monday from the apple store saying my laptop is fixed. Ha

3. I got an 85% in my math midterm, have a speech due the 2nd, and bought the book today ;)

4. My English paper is due tomorrow and I'm uploading Busta Rhymes "E.L.E" and blogging instead.

5. I can't find my laptop charger and i have more or less 70% battery life left as of now.


Oh Gosh. makes you really wonder, why fuck go to college in the first place? I can learn this shit myself. College is just for a piece of paper saying you certified. 
I mean I was feigning, I mean feigning to get into college and look what happens! I'm in this bitch and want to dip because I feel like what I'm learning is bullshit. Honestly classes like "Speech and English" Basic shit I can learn for myself. 

College should be for math, chemistry and shit you can't even learn naturally. I know I can't learn Chemistry from talking to the MTA guy for a metro card, well... shit who knows, if we speaking in dope boy language ;)

Besides that my vernacular has changed and we making moves (we meaning me and my brain)
Time for me to met people know wasup with Sasha and how I am literally no one you ever met, unless you met me aye!

Ohh shining light on this little Thrift store located on 14th street and 8th, 7th or 6th ave. totally forgot the exact location, buck it tho, its called "Rags-a-Go-Go" 
Copped some old school hats with the puffs, and a leather varsity jacket from the year 79' 
Whats cool is the lady "hand-picks" every piece of clothing in that place. Dedication!!

alright peace hoes who are pigeon toed

11.10.09

Feelin' So Good

Did you ever have a feeling of great things occuring?
maybe not immediately, but surely you feel like your life is going to change for the better. That's how I'm feeling! I'm not even sure if I said it before, but who cares I'll say t again!

My weekend was truly eventful and it was filled with incidents that, in my opinion, are only good omens.
Friday night hanging around chillin' ended up heading to 14th street Union Square
[sidenote: Macs are sooo cool I can just drag and drop this pic from the internet! Hello My Apple Hello!]

Down there on a Saturday, an accumulation of people are out: BMXer's, Skateboarders, Pot-Heads, [LOL :-)] and Rappers.

There was a cypha going down with a lot of people hailing from East side New York.
*BX bitches!! lol
There were good MC's, older MC's, and some who looked like they were just starting out.

Getting ready to leave, and stumble upon Wordspit.

So I went up to him and introduced myself and had a long talk with the guy.
Real calm, cool, and relaxed, he knew a lot about himself, what he wanted, why he was doing it and what it meant to him. Talking with him was really insprating and it gave me a new engine to lump into my drive, the old one was working, but the conversation had me on NITROS that night.

I was so pumped because the way he thought about life and things in general, mirrored mine but on another level of knowledge. I think he is gonna be a big splash in the industry, as well.
I felt kind of dumb though, I was nervous couldn't spit at all. SMH After the conversation though he brought out a side of me that only when I'm comfortable is seen. I spit him the song I was working on, and I believe dude was impressed!

Anyway I just wanted to highlight that last night was an all nighter. I was in high overdrive because of Word, and learned what kind of work goes into this Hip Hop game. I heard stories of what kind of hussle it took to even put a song up. A rusty mic and a stereo.
I'm priviledged I even have people with studios, who will let me come and work. Appreciate the little things in life.

No worrys thoough, up in those flashing lights, my name will headline ;)
Working on a new song I feel will bring something new to ya'll.

Peace and Love Gzz I'm about to eat som fried sweet potatoes =D HEY HEY!!

20.9.09

Said I Loved You But I Lied...


...Hmm this man sure was a sexy something. LoL... Long flowing mane and wolf chest...grrrllzzz

. SO anyway why I have this up is because of this thing boys and girls do.
Why is it, when you just meet somebody, and you are both feeling each other.
In a matter of weeks you get those "I miss you" Text. Me personally I don't mind it that much. What really catches me off-guard is the, "do you..?"

Halt.

Normally I would just answer with a plain ol' "No"
But i've come to see the error of my ways. Boys are oso sensitive. SMH
they may walk around boasting and acting like they are top dog, but honestly they are like little babies with armor on. When they are with someone they truly like all that macho facade falls to the ground.

So I've realized when I say No it hurts thier feelings :( But me personally I don't like to lie.
Its a turn-off in a relationship and I try ,y best to keep it 100.

I told my mom this and she said. "I feel the same so humor them!"

*Long Pause*

"but how mother"
"when they say they miss you...give them an awww thanks then change the subject to what they are up to"

GENiUS!!!

So for the most part this relationship thing is something that needs to be studied hard. It can never be easy.. if so. Someone's cheating, lying, or not that into you.


18.9.09

SHiYVEE TUBE Ep 1


blog tube... lol this me acting dumb on a friday night =D

Uniqlo and St.Marks

chilling in St.Marks
fun times. I realized that I shouldn't buy merchandise like glasses and ch
ains online unless I know they don't retail. Like sell to other distributors.
The same glasses I got off of ebay for 12.99+ S&H could've been purchased at St.MArks for literally half :\
But I did find these really cool Run-DMC-esque glasses. Real Funky





I Just wanted to showcase the craetive and stylish way this mannequin is dressed. Honestly I was looking around uniqlo and just stopped in my strides when I saw Mr. Mannequin.
The green corduroy pants, burgundy sweater checkered & pin stripped shirt n then the tie accents the pants with the green and brown n the tweed jacket to finsih it off. Immaculate!!


ii

17.9.09

the Fifth Element

Selfishness.
Something that can demolish a relationship and lead people to goa nd live with animals.
The human race cannot strive if all peopls think about is themselves. Its fine to do that kind of thing when you are alone, but if you are in a setting where you are forced to interact with people it has to come into effect. Kindness. SMH
Don't give that up. Watch people and act on their actions, thats another form of being sselfish. You been neglecting your girl or guy all day then wanna come around a day later and say..." what's wrong?" Sometimes looking and listening can be great senses.

Just wanted to put that out there!
TAKE HEED.... eggo waffle outz!

7.9.09

SHIY... ;)

sup..
havent been here in a while but I'm showing love to all my followers ad their blogs.
As for me I'm excited as EVER!!!..
hehe

I got two tracks. One I feature and one me just messing around and I like em alot.
Yea I'm about to be doing my thing out here in the rap world, so look out for me

The first time I recorded something I kind of hated it and never went back to listen, but these 2 (even though they not exactly what I wanted)
Its still better than before.
Check em out.
Honest Feedback!


16.8.09

I'm not saying im addicted

You have to know yourself as a person.
You have to understand what are the ugly things about you that you don't want others to know or see, and embrace that.
Make it apart of you and not dismiss it as if it doesn't ecist because that leads to guilt and hatred.
For example, people who may be gay or bi- and do not agree with this sensation they're having. Will lash out or defend; based on how they are at a openly gay person or people.

If you dont embrace you for you fully, then it will be a facade you wear.

I brought this up because LAST NITE had to be the craziest experience I've ever had.
Another thing. I think I'm meant to smoke weed.
Not even on some crackhead shit where "I NEED it man!", but more or less smoke it to open my eyes even more to the shit that goes on around me.
I feel that if I was sober that night. I wouldn't have been able to see all the details of what was going on with my sister and my close friend. Not had been able to see how it could've been fatal.

Weed is officially my best friend.

Another thing.
My job I got the only life lesson on friday.
My boss is so deep. I wish her and my mother could have a conversations of the mind.
I wouldn't mind recording that and putting it on this blog for all to view.

I think I have a huge fascination or better yet deep love for those who can express themselves and stay by what they believe.
It is the most attractive trait of a human being.

Another thing. This blogging shit seems like too much work. For the lil appreciation.
I love to read others blog and that good shit. But its losing substance. Everytime I go check a blog we talking about the same shit.
Money Cash Clothes and Hoes.
I need a vaca from this shit.
..I think imma plan a blogger cypha.
Most ya'll on here smoke or drink or something so we should plan a trip together.
Wouldn't that be nice?

10.8.09

I Love to Sing-a

ME + MY SIS.
DUO VLOG!!!!
FUCK CHYEA...
Today was fun. I'm pulling an all nighter so I can go to the hospital early for my check-up and then go to bmcc to register...after that. SLeeping the rest of the day away
LAAAA-LA-LA-LA-LA
LA-LA-LA-LA!!!

update:.. this shit is taking too long to upload.. I've successfully failed in uploading them a good 3 times.

8.8.09

Yet Afuckingain

I Lost my damn phone... Yet again good job...

So over this shit...

29.7.09

FOOD "FUKIN" SAFETY

*Ms. Fierce sits in her computer chair, lays her glasses on the table before her and rubs her eyes then graces temple and presses play*
...'MOVING ON UP, *moving on up* TO THE EAST SIDE!! *moving on up*...FINALLY GOT A PIECE OF THE PIEEEEYEEEE YEA HE YEAA HEEE!!!"

and scence..

WELL IT SEEMS AS IF OL' GIRL IS DOING SOMETHING RIGHT..
THEY WANT TO PROMOTE ME TO MANAGER!!
...IM NT PROUD OF IT AT ALL.
I'M KIND OF ASHAMED ACTUALLY.. OF HOW I BULLSHITTED MY WAY THROUGH THIS ESTABLISHMENT AND STILL MANAGED TO GAIN SUCCESS IN THE WORLD. REALLY SPEAKS TO MY CHARACTER.

who am i kidding... i'm a lil proud of myself.

BUT WITH GREAT POWER COMES GRET RESPONSIBILITY.
*spidey shots a web and brings sprite can closer...takes a swig*

I'M TAKING THESE ONLINE CLASSES... AND DAMMIT IF THEY DON'T TAKE A GOOD FIFTEEN MINUTES TO FINISH.

ITS REALLY BUGGED THOUGH.
BECAUSE IF YOU GET ONE QUESTION WRONG... AND THE QUESTIONS VARY FROM 4 TO 14.. YOU ARE ANNIHILATED.
THEN BROUGHT BACK TO LIFE...AS IN
YOU TAKE THE WHOLE LESSON OVER AND YOU CAN'T GO ON TO THE TEST.... UNTIL FIFTEEN MINUTES PASS.

A WHOLE LOT OF DONKEY SHIT I KNOW!!

SMH. I HAVE TO HAND THIS OVER TO THEM BY SATURDAY.
ITS A TOTAL OF 15 LESSONS.
IM ON 7 SMH!!
I CAN'T DO THIS FUCKERY.

BUT ENOUGH ABOUT MCD LETS TALK ABOUT MEE!!
i came to the conclusion. that I absolutely without a doubt do NOT like to drink...
its nasty, taste like shit, makes my stomach hurt, and it stank up my breath.

I'd choose weed over liqs anyday OK!!

oooo smh i so dumb I forgot...
met a fellow blogger about two or three weeks ago it was surreal.
I felt like... the internet brought us together.
Like a little someone was watching over us =)
it wasn't planned or anything thats the cool part :)
awesome.


20.7.09

Pet peeves and mac an cheese

For one... This goes to the folks who have had the privilegde of having my cell phone number..

•Dont hit me up talking about your "bored"
For one.. I don't give a shit. Two, unless you were planning on inviting me out to chill.. Umm what would you like me to do?
•Don't take my ipod and listen to the same shit you have on your own ipod.
You have to understand if the case is where you want me to hear a song you really enjoy..and then I give you my ipod to groove to some tunes an you deadass shuffling through songs while I have to listen to your bullshit smh.
•When we enter a train.. Dont grab the door seat if you enter first
First off the train cars seats are limited and if we going in a train and you enter first. Its cuortesy to slide ya ass to the side and let the person get the one with the rails. Fuck I gotta go a extra mile arou d you to sit if I came in second.
•Cheapness
Its tacky. Yes yes recession this recession that. But don't be a ass if you have it just spear it damn...
•Fakeness
Bitch dont come with no compliments or nothi g like that if you yourself dont like it. Something I really hate... "I could never wear anything like that, but you could pull it off" before I didnt mind people telling me that but now smh.. Why can't you rock it?!
•The word Bitch.
I use this word yes. But when people especially girls use it casually like.. Wasup bitch. *blank stare*
No. This will not work. Its not cute and I find it disrespectful...

Yea so that was a few or .. Alot of pet peeves that i just cant stand.. It irks the shit outta me... Just wanted to get that out there

15.7.09

..oh shit sun
i got a video blog :]

u inspire me to do things ;) u know who u are

yoo why this shit taking two years n a titty to upload :|

11.6.09

Ehh

I blog for me.. and I suck at following because i dont really read much of what some bloggers write no offense but sometime the shit is just boring...and it be the ones witht he most followers too..smh.

but yea.. just wanted to update on stuff i do

1.I'm addicted to sims 3...

2.imma quit my job..or get fired for stabbing a hoe

3.i want to woo hoo this sexy lil lite skan thang ;) "simlish" you know what im talking bout nana!!

4.i smoked some haze ..when the light was still out...so strange.

5.went to the park...mad fucking mexicans for noo reason.

6.ima freak bom chicka wom wom..

going to do something productive...peace love n tranquility!!!

ooo yea dont feel like backspacing. Going to a Bubble Fight thing tomorrow...hope to see you there....

7.6.09

MAD SHIT UNFOLDS!!!

WHEW! I HATE WHEN I DECIDE TO BLOG ABOUT A LOT OF THINGS THEN JUST...ABRUPTLY STOP.

ITS LIKE A SMACK IN THE FACE.
BUT THAT'S HOW I PIMP THESE HOES >;] *puts the powder on the pimp hand*

DOWN TO BUSINESS.
I WAS GOING TO MAKE A POST ENTITLED "LAME ASS B*SH PART 2 THE SEQUEL" TO MY LAMENESS IN MY PREVIOUS BLOG, BUT I DECIDED NOT TO.
1.. IT IS MY BLOG, BUT DAMN IF I WANT TO GET THAT PERSONAL.
2.. I HAD STUFF TO DO.

SO I'LL GIVE YOU GUYS THE BLURB.

"WHAT HAPPENED AS THE STORY UNFOLDED WITH MUPPET WAS THAT I WASN'T THE ONLY VICTIM. MUPPET HAD HIS EYE OUT FOR ALL OF THE McDONALDS CREW. YUCK!!
WHAT A DICK.
BUT STILL, IT'S NOT LIKE I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT I WAS GETTING INTO, ITS JUST THAT I THOUGHT I COULD BE SUPERMAN AND SAVE A HOE."

AHA

GUESS NOT.
ON THE BRIGHT SIDE. I HAVE GOOD NEWS.
AFTER MY NEAR BREAKDOWN AT MY JOB..[thats when they told me the juicy bossip ;)]
I CAME UP WITH A PLAN TO MAKE THAT BOYS' LIFE A LIVING HELL.

..THAT WENT OUT THE WINDOW THOUGH, TOO MUCH TIME AND EFFORT GOES INTO THAT SHIT ...
A FRIEND DID ASK IF I WANTED HIM DEAD THOUGH! BUT I DIGRESS.
I REALIZED THAT THAT BOY.. THAT MUPPET IS JUST A PUPPET AND HIS BOYS AND HIS COMMUNITY ARE PULLING THE STRINGS. ITS NOT EVEN LIKE HE WAS BALLING OUT THE ASS, OR EVEN A HOT COMMODITY. HE'S JUST... ELMO :\
HE IS JUST A SAD PERSON WHO HAS NEVER BEEN LOVED AND USES THAT AS AN EXCUSE TO FUCK AROUND WITH GIRLS FEELINGS. ITS SAD BUT I HAVE NO REMORSE FOR A COWARD. EVEN AFTER IT WAS FOUND OUT HE WAS A JERK HE AVOIDED THE PLACE..

***PUSSY!***

I DIGRESS AGAIN!!
BACK TO GOOD NEWS
I FINALLY GOT MY PHONE!! YESS NIGGA YESSS!!!!!!! *pharrell voice*

THE enV3 ..

BOW IN THE PRESENCE OF GREATNESS.

FUNNY FUNNY.. MY LITTLE SISTER HAS THE enV, THE OLDEST HAS THE enV2, AND I HAVE THE enV3
HAHAHA WHAT A COINCIDENCE..
O_o

ANOTHER LITTLE PIECE OF DINGLE BERRYS FOR YOU GUYS TO ENJOY!
THIS ISN'T CERTAIN BUT I MIGHT ACTUALLY HAVE A LOVE INTEREST.
THAT LIKES ME BACK! *giggles like a little school girl*
tee heeee

I'M SO HYPE IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY!
*my plan to bring down muppet is going accordingly >:}*
...YEAH SO I'M EXTRA HYPE AND HAPPY AND HE'S SEXY AND HE LIVES RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER AND HE'S 6'2 AND OOOO *puts hand over chest and fans herself feverishly*
HUNNY CHILE HUNNY CHILE JUST THINKING ABOUT HIM!

BUT... I DIGRESS..
YET AGAIN!
THATS ENOUGHT OUT OF ME... I'M GOING TO GO PLAY SIMS 3 AND SEE IF I CAN BRING HOME A SUGAR DADDY FOR BIG MAMA
GO BIG GIRL!!!!!!

********toodles*******

26.5.09

UGHH SASHA...UR LAME!!!!!

SO I OFFICIAL CONSENT TO BEING THE ULTIMATE LAME!.

IN THE SENSE THAT I PREACH ALL THIS GOOD SHIT ABOUT .

."YEA DONT BEG FOR A NIGGA!"
AND
"IF HE DONT CALL U FUCK THAT DUCHE BAG"
AND
"OOO I GOT FLOWS TOO... U JUST ONE OF MANY!!"


...I AM ASHAMED TO SAY ALL THAT LOGIC WAS KNOCKED DOWN. JUST LIKE KERI HILSON... I WAS KANYE SMASHED TO PIECES.! >:[

OKAY SO ITS LIKE THIS..REMEMBER WHEN I GAVE YALL A LIL EXCERPT OF ME AND A BOY FROM HIGH SCHOOL HOOKING UP AND KICKING IT??

WELL SATURDAY I WENT OUT WITH MY GUY D. AND FOR SOME REASON THE WOMAN IN ME DECIDED IT WAS TIME TO UNLEASH WOMANLY FURRY UPON THIS NIGGA.

FOR THE TIME BEING WE CAN CALL HIM MUPPET.

HERE'S THE CONVO. VIA TEXT MESSAGE!


ME: U KNOW U A CLOWN FOR REAL RIGHT?

MUPPET: YEA [
BLAH BLAH SOME SMART COMMENT...FORGOT B/C ME IN A RAGE DELETED ALL HIS MESSAGES TODAY!!!!]

ME: WHY YOU HAVEN'T HIT ME UP??

MUPPET: I WAS GOING TO BUT I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY..

*
ROLLS EYES*

ME: U NEED A TOPIC TO TALK TO ME?

.....5 MINUTES OF NO REPLY.. [
IN THE TEXTING WORLD THAT'S FOREVERMORE]

ME: DON'T TREAT ME LIKE A F**KING FLOW A**HOLE...
[
A LITTLE BRASH?]

MUPPET: DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT PLEASE.

ME: DON'T TALK TO ME AT ALL.


AND THE ACADEMY AWARD FOR OVERLY DRAMATIC GOES TO!!

BUT I HAD GOOD CAUSE MAN!

LAST TIME I SAW MUPPET WAS THURSDAY RIGHT?

HE HASN'T SPOKEN TO ME, HIT ME UP, OR ANYTHING UNTIL SATURDAY WEN I INITIATED IT.

TOADY'S TUESDAY AND HE STILL DIDN'T HIT ME UP OR ANYTHING... SMH

SOOOO

LIKE THE LAME P**SY I AM... I HIT HIM WITH A TEXT.
UGHHH I KNEW I SHOULDN'T HAVE.
LIKE THERE WERE SO MANY SIGNS.
IT WOULDN'T SEND FOR MAD LONG... AND I KEPT TYPING IT WRONG.
THE GODS WERE TRYING TO SAVE ME THE EMBARRASSMENT BUT NOOOO
I JUST HAD TO DO IT.
AND WHAT MAKES IT WORSE. 10 MINUTES LATER NO REPLY.. THEN I SENT ANOTHER TEXT.

"WTF IS WRONG WITH THIS BITCH?" *SIDE EYE*..

I KNOW I FEEL LIKE THE ONLY DICK FACE BUT URGGHKLE.. I CAN'T HELP IT :[

HONEST TO GOD THAT WAS THE ONLY SEMI-....RELATIONSHIP??? I HAD EVER.
EVER!!! AND IT LASTED A GOOD WEEK.

OMG.

I AM A TOTAL AND COMPLETE LAME ASS BIT*H.
SMH I TOLD MY SIS AND SHE AGREES.

*POUTS*

AND THE WORST PART IS.
HE NOT EVEN THAT SERIOUS!!!
I COULD UNDERSTAND IF HE LOOKED LIKE...CHRIS PINE >:]

LIKE FOR ME TO EVEN BE FEIGNING OR REALLY SWEATING OVER
HE SOME REGULAR NIGGA..
IF NOT KIND WEIRD LOOKING.

BUT HE GOT GAME..AND APPARENTLY MUCH FLOW.
[HE MADE THAT APPARENT WHEN HE WAS TALKING
ON THE PHONE TO THEM WHILE I WAS DEPARTING.]

...ITS TOMORROW.. AND HE STILL DIDNT HIT ME BACK. I HAVE A FEELING IM GOING TO SEE HIM TOMORROW... AND IMMA BE A REAL SNOOTY BISH ABOUT IT.

...IF I DONT BREAK DOWN RIGTH THERE ON THE MCDONALDS FLOOR.. :[


OUTT.....LAME BISH..

24.5.09

WALKING VERSUS DOIING STUFF MANG..

I HAD MEANT TO POST THIS AWHILE BACK BUT, ONE THING LED TO ANOTHER AND I FORGOT.

IT WAS A SUBJECT THAT IS TOUCHY AND WHEN PEOPLES REAL FEELINGS AND PERSPECTIVES ARE LET OUT. ITS ALMOST TABOO TO EVEN THINK ABOUT THINKING THAT WAY.

ANYWAY TO THE POINT!.

I'M NOT SURE BUT LETS SAY A WEEK BACK A FELLOW BLOGGER HAD HIT ME UP ON MYSPACE USING THAT I.M. THING.

ANYWAY I WAS ASKED IF I HAD GONE TO THE AIDS WALK?

I REPLIED.

ME: NO...FOR WHAT?

THEY WERE LIKE WHAT?? TO BENEFIT PEOPLE WITH AIDS AND HELP FIND A CURE.!

ME: ....AND?

BASICALLY LEMME BREAK THIS DOWN.

I HOLD CERTAIN THINGS TRUE TO ME AND I WILL STAND FOR A CAUSE I BELIEVE IN.
I WILL ALSO PARTICIPATE IN SOMETHING I BELIEVE WILL BENEFIT THOSE WHO NEED IT.

AS FOR THAT AIDS WALK... I CANNOT BRING MYSELF TO PAERICIPATE.
DONT THINK IM CRUEL BUT I JUST BELIEVE THAT IF WE CAN SPEND THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS ORGANIZING IT AND ADVERTISING IT, MERCHANDISE AND ALL THESE OTHER MIDDLEMEN THAN WHY CAN'T WE JUST USE ALL THE MONEY WE JUST BLEW FOR ALL OF THAT.
AND SEND IT INTO THESE LABS SO THEY CAN FIND A CURE?

PUT IT LIKE THIS.
PEOPLE HAVE BEEN WALKING FOR AIDS FOR MANY YEARS.
AND EVEN AFTER ALL THOSE YEARS, AFTER ALL THOSE BILLIONS OF DOLLARS.
WE STILL DON'T HAVE A CURE???

OR AT LEAST A SUBSTITUTE NOTHING AT ALL? NO KIND OF PROGRESS ??
I FEEL LIKE ITS NONSENSE THEN.


MAYBE IF IT WAS MORE OF A HANDS ON WAY OF HELPING WHERE IM ACTUALLY SEEING AND DOING THINGS THAT I CAN SEE FOR MYSELF IS HELPING.

LIKE FEEDING THE HUNGRY AND HOMELESS OR GIVING AWAY CLOTHING TO FAMILIES IN NEED, OR SENDING MONEY GRAMS TO THOSE WHO NEED IT SO WHEN THEY OPEN THEIR MAIL THEY HAVE A CHECK FOR WHATEVER SUM OF MONEY. SO THEY CAN CASH IT!!

LIKE I WANT TO DO SOMETHING WHERE I CAN SEE THE PROGRESS OF MY HELP.
BUT IF YOU GONNA HAVE ME WALKING UP AND DOWN MANHATTAN FOR HOWEVER LONG AND ALL I GET TO SEE IS SWEATY STINK PEOPLE, AND CRUSHED UP DIXIE CUPS, THEN NO!

IF ALL I GET TO SEE IS THE 11'0CLOCK NEWS DOCUMENTING ...PEOPLE WALKING!! THEN NO

I'M NOT WALKING FOR SHIT!
FUCK THAT.

TO ME IT SEEMS LIKE A DAMN GIMMICK...
LIKE SOME TOM FOOLERY .
IM NOT KNOCKING THOSE WHO DO DO THESE EVENTS, FOR THEM I AM HAPPY IF IT MAKES THEM HAPPY.

JUST DONT COME AT ME LIKE IM WIERD.. BECAUSE I CHOOSE TO NOT WALK. AND YOU DONT LIKE MY BELIEFS

THATS HOW I AM.
I DONT KNOW HOW SASHA FIERCE WOULD REACT BUT... THIS IS HOW SASHA DOES IT.
I'D RATHER BE ON THE COMITTEE WHO HELPS FIND THE CURE, OR BE THE NURSE IN THE HOSPITAL THAT TENDS TO THE SICKLY.

THAN WALK A BLOCK AND GO HOME.

...I THINK IM JUST MORE OF A HANDS ON TYPE OF GIRL...

ME SIGNING OUT...

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